Monday, December 4, 2006

i hate magic!!!

so far my retreat from the BCs has been uneventful. that is more due to my not feeling like stopping anywhere. i'm just kinda depressed to be frank... or uh what? why to people say that anyway. i'm traumador... not frank

the fact most of the places so far were those i'd already passed through to get to vancouver didn't help either. i even sped to get past hope and dinotown! however i'm now on a new northern highway that is a quicker route to drumheller so in theory there is new stuff around here...

it's like the universe likes to taunt me. it started raining the day i left. even mother natural wants to enhance my sadness...

after 2 days of straight driving i was kinda needing a break. well and gas. oh and sleep. hmmmm food. need food sometime too!




needing all these things i came to an area of inner BC called the enchanted forest. i figured anywhere that needed a sign on the highway must have a gas station or something... of course it was raining even worse here. i decided the key thing was to sleep first, and then solve all my other problems when i got up.

i mean whats the worst thing that could happen to me while sleeping in a forest?

when i woke up it was pouring hard as ever. fine i figured this way i'll just get my fuel and food and keep driving. still a long way to drumheller




heading deeper into this enchanting forest i was shocked to discover there was no gas station anywhere to be found... in fact there was almost nothing... except a really creepy looking castle...


pulling up to it i hoped that they'd at least have a horse or something i could ride to get gas... cause my car was running really low, and i didn't want to get stranded!


getting out of my car i headed towards the castle with the intent of seeing if i could bum some gas of the medieval occupants. if only things were as simple as they should be... getting closer to the fortress two really weird looking mammal sauropods popped out of the forest.

"beware stranger." they said in unison... man i hate it when that happens. it always means trouble! "this is not a friendly realm for visitors. even ancient ones such as yourself..."

okay so if that wasn't a scary prophecy or warning i don't know what was going to be. still if it is a uncool place for me to be i needed that gas then. so i kept on walking towards the castle!



well you're never going to guess what happened next people of the innerweb. or well maybe you have cause you looked at the picture... approaching the front gate of the castle suddenly a dragon appeared on top of the parapits...

okay this was just getting weird!

i wasn't about to let some stinking monster lizard stop me though! i might be scared of a lot of things, but giant reptiles with sharp teeth aren't one of them... this guy was nothing compared to my cousin Larry...

well okay he's not much compared to Larry unless you take into account his atomic fire breath!!!

needless to say i cheesed it out of there!!!


man i hated this place. all i was trying to do was get out of it, and it won't let me! just before i got really mad (and i mean REALLY mad!) i heard a voice from behind me.

"why so glum chum?" said a big... i'm not making this up... egg sitting on a rock wall... "have you had a candy can for your tum?"

no i replied. what was with this whole place i wondered. a talking egg... i didn't say a word of this out loud you have to understand, but yet suddenly as though the egg heard me.

"oh this place is a little bit like that you see." it started "like one two three. lots of magic about to fill you with you glee. now what is your greatest wish to be?"

after my misadventures in vancouver i just wasn't in the mood for this. "i just want gas!"

"such a request why consider it done." replied the egg. "now off you go for lots more fun"

i was so mad. now it was toying with me too. all i wanted to do was get out of here, and it was mocking me with its stupid rhyme!

now i looked down while angrily thinking this. when i looked up the crazy talking egg was gone... as was the castle, the sauropodmammals, and even the atomic dragon... it was like none of it happened.

yet when i got to my car and started it up (fearing i'd get stranded here in this crazy forest) my gas tank was full!!!

oh man! so that stupid egg offered me my one wish, and i wished for a tank of gas!

i could got that wii i really wanted!!!

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