Grilled Cheesus

After being disappointed in last week's Brittany Spears tribute episode, I loved every minute of this week's episode of Glee. What I loved most about the episode is that the entire episode was devoted to the issue of faith. The show honestly and openly struggled with issues of faith, doubt, God's existence, and the nature of the church. In many ways, it dealt with these things in much deeper ways than many sermons I have heard or ever preached.
In the midst of grief over his father's hospitalization, Kurt Hummel expressed what many feel in life. He doesn't believe God exists. He feels as if the church has judged him and condemned him. He has already lost his mom to death and facing the fear of losing his father, he lashes out when his friends who try to comfort him with words of faith and prayers. It's hard to know if Kurt really doesn't believe in God or if he is just really mad at God.
Sue Sylvester seems to be consumed by this same kind of anger at God. Her sister has downs syndrome and was ridiculed as a child. Part of Sue's meanness seems to evolve from seeing how others treated her sister. She also figures there is no God because why would a loving God allow her sister to suffer ridicule or even be born with downs syndrome in the first place. Of course, her sister, who does believe in God, says that "God doesn't make mistakes." She also offers to pray for Sue. Sue seems to be more of an agnostic hoping to be proved wrong.
Finn seems to be the one who experiences the most dramatic spiritual roller coaster during the episode. He sees the image of Jesus on a grilled cheese sandwich and begins praying to it. His prayers are answered and he feels really good and faithful. However, when he prays to be reinstated as the quarterback of the football team and the current quarterback is injured causing Finn's prayer to be answered, he feels guilty and questions his faith in Jesus or the "grilled cheesus".
I kept thinking about Jesus' parable of the sower and the seeds that were sown on the stony ground as I watched Finn. They have no root and when the sun comes up, they wither away. Jesus says that many people find faith and are filled with good feelings but when hardship comes, because their faith is not rooted in the Word, they are easily discouraged when tested. By the end of the episode, Finn eats the "grilled cheesus" and seems to be floundering in doubt and at the same time sincerely searching.
Mercedes for me is the kind of Christian I'd like to be. She does not hide her faith. She accepts that not everyone shares her faith but she still is not afraid to witness to her God and even invites Kurt the atheist to church. Mercedes invites Kurt to have faith and to lean on that faith. Of course, she sings a wonderful rendition of Bridge Over Troubled Water that pulled at my heart strings.
Mercedes' church is loving and accepting. They offer God praise and invite others to know the love and grace that they have discovered in their lives. It was this church scene that seems to have had the deepest impact upon me as I reflect upon the episode. While I know that this television representation of the church is rather shallow and doesn't represent the fullness of what the church is, I found myself wishing that I could discover such a church in real life.
I have never left the church, even when I didn't much feel like being a part of the church and I felt like the church didn't want me to be a part of it. I still believe that the church, as the Body of Christ, can be a community of hope for the world. While I know that all churches have their problems and challenges because they are made up of sinful human beings, I just wish that more of the churches I encountered in my ministry would have erred on the side of grace rather than the side of judgment. I wish that in those times when I most needed acceptance from my fellow Christians, it would have been offered. While I forgive them, sometimes it still hurts.
Watching this episode of Glee reminded me again of how the arts allow us to express things that we find hard to express in other ways. We can sing of our love for God and cry out to God for help. We can express our faith and even dare to express life's unanswerable questions. Like prayer, art allows us to communicate with the God Who loves us and claims us and gives us the freedom to doubt.
Thanks for being a part of my journey!