Unfortunately, daily blog posts have not been the norm for some time now. Our visionary writers attribute this to the nature of the employment market: the truth of the matter is that Shane and Jason have become so nerve-wracked by the ongoing free agency of Lebron James that neither can sleep, eat, or, at any rate, blog. ESPN’s persistent coverage of every minor rumor regarding James’ future home has truly proven useful to our restless riders as their only sustenance.
With that in mind, please excuse potential spelling errors in the following piece of literary genius:
Waking up in the homey Stein house immediately made the team forget about its accommodations at the Ritz the night before. Well, maybe nobody will ever forget the Ritz Jacuzzi, but that doesn’t mean the team wasn’t continually amazed by the Stein’s help with all things, from breakfast to route planning and even pool lessons. Nonetheless, our riders awoke for a white water rafting trip down the world famous Clear Creek . As everyone made it groggily to the van, Zane sans cowboy hat for once, Shane sans identification papers, Claire sans makeup, Jason sans a shirt, and Sanford clearly “con” Twilight book, the team could only wonder if they would be able to ford the river without losing any oxen.
As usual, our team was more than satisfied with its rafting decision. Providing a challenge to our Stanford Rowers equitable to breaking 1:40.00 on a twenty minute erg test, the Class 3 and 4 rapids were more difficult than anything our riders had ever encountered. The trip, a lengthy 1.5 hours long, was filled with overly strenuous exercise, incredible conversation, and countless water breaks.
Those of us who had rafted before were disappointed; those who had not somewhat close-mindedly pledged never to make the mistake again. However, the entire rafting experience was not a waste—the trip was saved by the engaging talk our riders gave to the owner of the company about FACE AIDS and its microloan programs. It is true that even the roughest stone reflects some light. Thanks to excellent discussion, our rafting experience was, put simply, unforgettable.
Tuesday ended with amazing lasagna courtesy of the Steins. At the kids table sat Zane, Sanford, and Shane, a dinner party that quickly descended into chaos. When Zane refused to allow Shane to wear his cowboy hate, Shane took the oranges he brought to dinner from the plates of his tablemates. Zane ended up chasing Shane out of the house, over the fence, and across the Aurora Reservoir/Gulf, back into the undeveloped land south of the Stein household. Meanwhile, oblivious as usual was good old “Sanny” who continued to read Twilight and ponder the next location to place his smoothie cup. While Shane emigrated from the Stein’s, Jason and Claire enjoyed dinner with Mr and Mrs Stein. Wise, clever, and always witty, Mr Stein provided the lost New Yorker with directions home and advice on how to live a good life: Step 1/1 Renounce the Yankees and give up on the Knicks. As Claire tried to spirit away some lasagna so as to reverse-engineer it later, Jason simply nodded his head, ignoring every word out of Mr Stein’s mouth.
Finally, our team hit the hay, ready for its big (130 mile) ride the next day. Clearly the journey to Sterling, CO would be a wake-up call for out rested and lazy riders. Beset by tire problems and dreary skies, our riders found themselves resting on the side of the road for some time, discussing international politics, the potential for FACE AIDS expansion, and English tea. While Mike and Kirsten found their own Sacajaweas to aid them on their winding journey, the rest of the team played a round of the children’s game of GHOST. Despite Zane’s unique spelling prowess and Shane’s arguing for the acceptance of “mañana,” the game was quickly wittled down to our two contestants of the Book, Jason and Claire. Jason made short work of his cross-country rival, once more asserting New York’s dominance over San Francisco.
Eventually, the entire team made it successfully to Sterling. With high spirits after a truly rewarding, renewing, and purely amazing day, the team looks forward to the endless cornfields of Nebraska with an anxious fervor. Tomorrow, the ride to Ogallala, NE will be a mere 89 miles, providing no challenge at all for our always energized and enthusiastic team.
Belated Fourth of July Trivia: How many children under the age of 13 in the USA are estimated to be living with AIDS?
Bonus Question: One paragraph in this blog post is completely sarcastic. Can you guess which? (Hint: Replace the letter “f” in fast to find out!!!!)
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